I Corinthians 13:6 

      A few weeks ago as we talked about the definition of love, we referred to C.S. Lewis’ quote, that “Divine Gift-love … desires what is simply best for the beloved.”  But what IS best for the beloved?  Is it best to let them do whatever they want?  Is it best to give them everything they desire?  Every parent here will quickly answer “NO!”  Real love does not do whatever; it does not say whatever – as someone has written, love is not like a glob of jello – it has boundaries.  That what it means here in I Corinthians 13:6 when it says that love “does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth.”  As we continue our study on agape love in this chapter, we see again that love is not just a good feeling.  It is described in this chapter by 15 verbs, and the two we are looking at today tell us that love is pure: it flourishes within the God-given boundaries of love and truth. 

 I.  Love’s Standards

     There is not a lot of exegesis to do here; this phrase reads in the original Greek Bible pretty much as it does in English: love … “does not rejoice in a-dikia” – “dikaios” means righteous; the “a” privative before the word means “not” – so it means that love does NOT find joy in what is not righteous – but it DOES rejoice in what is true and right.  Love is not just a feeling; it is pure; it has standards of right and wrong.      

     Now I said from the very beginning of this study that although we like to think of I Corinthians 13 as a romantic poem – and there are certainly applications of these truths to romantic love relationships – the original context here is that the Lord is speaking these words to the church at Corinth about their relationships with people in the church.  Several of these 15 qualities deal directly with specific problems they were having at the church atCorinthin the first century.  I think that is probably the case with this particular phrase: “does not rejoice in unrighteousness.”  It is very likely that this was referring to a specific problem in the Corinthian church.  If you go back to I Corinthians 5, the Bible tells us there that Paul addressed a specific situation which was going on in their church: a man was living in immorality with his father’s wife.  Paul rebuked them and said, the Gentiles don’t even do that!  But he said in :2, “You have become arrogant and have not mourned instead.”  In other words, they didn’t mourn over the fact that someone in their church was living in this kind of blatant immorality, but they were arrogant about it – amazingly enough, in a sense they “gloried” in it, saying, “look how tolerant we are”!  Paul said in :6 “Your boasting is not good.”  So they were evidently “boasting” about how “open-minded” and tolerant they were of the sin that was going on in their church!  They were literally “rejoicing in unrighteousness”! 

     Unfortunately, there are many churches and individuals today who do the same thing.  They “glory” in how “tolerant” they are – even of things which are expressly prohibited by scripture.  They say things like: look how tolerant we are: we have a woman as a pastor; look how tolerant we are; we have practicing homosexuals as deacons; look how tolerant we are, we have couples who are living together serving in leadership positions in the church … they “rejoice” in these things and brag about how ‘loving’ they are!  One major denomination had a big ad campaign a couple of years ago which boldly proclaimed how they had “open hearts, open minds.”  They were proudly proclaiming to the world how “open” and supposedly “loving” they were!  But the Bible says that glorying in what is unrighteous – what the Bible clearly calls sin – is not love!  It is license; it is libertinism; it is compromise; it is NOT love!  Compromising the truth by endorsing sinful behavior is not Biblical love! 

     Some years ago my sister Erin was a summer missionary, and she went to help a church in pioneer church area in another part of the country.  One day while she was there, she made a visit to the home of a woman, andErininvited the woman to come to worship at the church she was working with.  The woman said, “Oh, I know that church; the guy who leads worship there and my daughter had a baby together.” Erinsaid, “Oh, I didn’t know he was married to your daughter.”  She said, “Oh, he’s not!”  Well,Erinof course made a quick retreat right back to the church, and asked a woman there if this was true.  The woman laughed and said, “oh, yeah, that’s true.” Erinsaid, “Well, if he’s doing that kind of thing, do you think he should be leading worship at the church?”  And the woman said, “Well, we just love him too much ….” 

     Listen: letting sin continue rampant and unchecked is not real love!  Love “does not rejoice in unrighteousness; it rejoices with the truth.”  When you really love someone, you don’t let them do whatever they want to do.  When you really love someone, you want what is best for them. That means you want them to be holy; to be righteous.  That means that you are not content for them to remain in their sin; Love does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices when they are living according to the truth. 

     There is a lot of application here for our doctrine and theology, and inter-church relationships.  There is a kind of “love” that is being touted today that says, “It doesn’t matter what you believe, let’s just all ‘love’ each other.”  You hear people saying things like: “Let’s don’t fight over doctrines with other churches; let’s just love.”  This is the basis of what is called the “ecumenical movement” – let’s just get all the churches together and we’ll all love each other, no matter what they believe.  Well, that sounds good on the surface, but the truth is that love that is based on something less than the truth is not Biblical love!  That is just a surface sentimentality; it is not love.  Love rejoices in the truth.  There are truths that matter: it matters whether you believe that God is a Triune God; it matters whether you believe that Jesus is Divine; it matters whether you believe in a real heaven and a real hell; it matters whether you believe that what the Bible clearly calls sin really is sinful and separates us from God.  Real agape love cannot rejoice together with unrighteousness; it must rejoice in the truth.  Again we see that love is not merely a “good feeling” we have towards other people.  It is based on something more; and one of the important things it is based on is the truth.  Real love has standards of righteousness and truth. 

     There are certainly applications for this at home.  So many of us have heard the teenagers’ protest: “You don’t love me; you are being mean to me!”  And by that they mean: don’t give me any standards, or restrictions; don’t keep me from doing whatever I want.  But letting your kids do whatever they want to do is not love.  As we have seen repeatedly, agape love does what is best for the person it loves.  So real love will do its best to keep the person they love, holy. Real love will try to protect your kids from messing up their lives on the internet; real love will tell them they can’t date that person who is not good for them, real love will keep them from running with those friends who would drag them down.  Real love doesn’t let them drink whatever they want, or go wherever they want, or do whatever they want.  Real love gives them boundaries; real love gives them a bedtime, real love makes them do their homework; real love follows through on the discipline that was promised.  Don’t you fall for that “you don’t love me” line, mom or dad!  And don’t “glory” in how “open-minded” you are towards your kids.  Real love does not rejoice in unrighteousness.  You keep high standards for your kids, and help them to learn to do what is right; that is real love! 

     It is true in the church, for our doctrine and practice; it is true at home – and in every relationship you have: real love has standards of righteousness and truth. 

 II.  Love’s Joy

     The fact that agape love is pure also means that it does not find joy in sin.  Now, you might think that would go without saying, but there are several pertinent applications of this principle:

— it means not only are we to avoid trying to find pleasure in unrighteousness; but also that we need to avoid finding pleasure in watching OTHERS practice unrighteousness.  Many Christians who would not dream of participating in immorality or violence, rejoice in that same immorality or violence vicariously through television, movies, or video games.  Some of the old Puritans would not go to plays because they felt that the spirit of what was being portrayed would, in a sense, possess you as a spectator.  I might not carry that belief that far; but I do know that we are influenced greatly by what we watch.  And I think that it is a legitimate question for every Christian to ask themselves as they watch or participate in these things: “Am I rejoicing in unrighteousness?” 

— it means that you will not rejoice in doing anything unrighteous WITH another person whom you say you love.  Genuine love is not built up by fellowshipping together in activities which are sinful.  Ungodly movies and videos will NOT help your marriage relationship.  Unrighteous activities never build up true love.   

— this principle also means that love does not find joy in sharing together the “juicy morsels” of the details of other people’s lives through gossip.  Many people “rejoice in unrighteousness” through the savory re-telling of other people’s faults and sins. 

     In the old classic movie version of Jane Austen’s, Pride & Prejudice, Mr. Bingley meets the young Miss Jane Bennet, and spends most of the evening dancing and conversing with her.  At the end of the time, he says to her: I have conversed with you all night, and you have not had a single negative word to say about anyone! 

     I wonder: could anyone say that about you?  How long does it take you, in your conversations, to start tearing into other people; to start gossiping about what you’ve heard about others, to nit-pick at their real or imagined faults?  Some of you would have to admit that this is the biggest part of your conversation!  Maybe you have entire friendships with people which are built entirely upon “rejoicing in unrighteousness” – gossiping about the faults and failures of others.  But under God it is wrong; and what you have with that other person is not a friendship of agape love; for love “does not rejoice in unrighteousness”. 

      This principle also means that you never rejoice in doing malicious things to others, or in seeing bad things happen to another person:

— it means that you never take revenge on someone. 

— it means that you will not find joy in the stinging comment that you could “zap” someone with.      

— it means that you will not rejoice when something unrighteous or unfortunate happens to another person – even an enemy.  Proverbs 24:17-18 says, “Do not rejoice when your enemy falls, and do not let your heart be glad when he stumbles; or the Lord will see it and be displeased …”. 

     I can vividly remember laying in bed a few months ago, hearing a news alert on my phone, and looking at the headline that Usama Bin Laden had been killed.  Later I saw the videos of how many Americans went out into the streets and celebrated with high five’s, and dancing and rejoicing.  One commentator said the picture looked strangely familiar: he said it reminded him of the Arab mobs who celebrate when Americans are attacked and killed.  He lamented: I thought that we were supposed to be different …

I’ll tell you what I did; honestly, I put the phone down, laid back in bed, and my first thoughts were: that man is in hell.  To me it was very sobering: here was a man, a living soul, created in the image of God; created to know and love God – who is now eternally burning in hell, under the fierce wrath of God Almighty – and that is exactly where, I MYSELF should be at this very moment – except that God has shown me His grace!

     God Himself says in Ezekiel: “I take no pleasure in the death of the wicked.”  There is justice that needs to be done; there are punishments that need to be carried out; but love does not rejoice in the downfall of others.  Be very careful about wishing that others would “get what they deserve” – do you really want to get what YOU deserve? 

     And listen: it doesn’t just apply to geopolitical situations like the fall of Bin Laden or Gaddafi.  Do you enjoy seeing other people suffer?  You might say “no” – but think about it: do you feel a little better when other people’s kids grades suffer too?  Do you enjoy seeing the person who criticized you struggle financially?  Don’t you like to see some people “get what is coming to them”?  

     Don’t rejoice in the downfall and difficulties of others; it breeds a mean and vindictive sprit in your heart.  Matthew Henry, the old Puritan commentator, wrote: “It is the very height of malice to take pleasure in the misery of a fellow creature.”  Don’t rejoice when bad things happen to other people – not even your enemies.  Jesus commands you to love even your enemies; and rejoicing over the bad things that happen to other people is not love.  Love finds no joy in sin – or in any harm done to others. 

 III.  Love’s Example

     As in all of the 15 qualities of love we see in I Corinthians 13, Jesus is our great example. 

     Jesus shows us that real love upholds standards of righteousness and truth without compromise.  When He met the Rich Young Ruler in Mark 10, :21 says that “Jesus felt a love for him”.  Jesus loved this man; He wanted him to follow Him and be in heaven with Him.  But when the man asked Him what he had to do to get eternal life, Jesus did not withhold the truth from him.  He told him to go and sell his possessions and come follow Him.  He said that to reveal to this man, who thought that he had “kept all these commandments from (his) youth” that the truth was that he loved his possessions more than he loved God, and that was idolatry.  He had sinned; he needed a Savior.  Just because Jesus loved him, did not mean that He did not tell him the truth about where he really stood in life, and what he needed to do.  Real love doesn’t compromise righteousness and truth; rather it speaks the truth, even when it is difficult.

     Jesus does this for us, too.  He said in Revelation 3:19, “Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline; therefore be zealous and repent.”  Jesus does not rejoice in letting us do whatever we want; because that is not real love.  He disciplines us; He reproves us; He draws us back to holiness and righteous living.  And He does all of that for us precisely BECAUSE HE DOES love us.  Real love does not let the one it loves run rampant; real love disciplines.  As we have seen, this is true in the church, in our families, in every arena.

     This means that there are times when you tell somebody: “you know I love you, but the way you are living is wrong.”  It means that you don’t just agree with any crazy theological point that somebody makes because you want to be “loving.”  Real love tells the truth!  Ephesians says that “speaking the truth in love” we will grow up to be like Jesus.  Jesus really loved that Rich Young Ruler – and because He loved him, He told him the truth.  The same thing is true for you.  If you really love someone, you won’t say: “Oh, I love these people; I can’t tell them that what they are doing is wrong.”  NO!  That is not love!  Real love can’t rejoice while the one you love continues to live in sin; real love can’t rejoice while the one you love is living and believing a lie.  As we have seen time and again, agape love seeks what is truly best for the one who is loved – which means that it will speak the truth, and will not be content with their unrighteousness, but will seek to help them become holy before God.  If you don’t do that, you don’t really love them. 

     A few years ago, a man came up to Penn Jillette, of the magic team Penn & Teller — who says he is an atheist — backstage and gave him a Bible, and briefly shared the gospel with him.  Someone asked him if he was offended by it – Jillette said no.  He said he respected the man’s beliefs and sincerity – and especially the sweet and winsome way in which he shared with him.  He said, this guy believes that he knows the way to have eternal life, and so he wanted to share it with me.  He said, I respect that.  And then he said: “How much do you have to hate somebody to believe that everlasting life is possible and not tell them that?”   That’s a question a lot of us should think about!    

     It is easy to SAY to someone, “I love you” – but do you really?  “Talk is cheap.”  Real love has standards.  Real love tells the truth.  Real love shares the gospel – not to “get a notch in your belt” for “shooting the gospel” at someone – but because you really care.  And that’s the bottom line question: do you really care?   Do you really love the people around you?      

     David Uth, the former pastor of First Baptist Church, West Monroe, led a big outreach campaign at their church a few years ago, and he went to the house of a man, who opened the door and stood there with a can of beer in his hand, and said very frankly to him: “Are you here as part of some church program, or do you really care about me?”  That man’s statement ought to search the heart of every one of us today.  Do you really love people?  It’s easy to say you do – but do you really? 

— Do you love them enough to tell them that they way they are living is not going to work?

— Do you love them enough to tell them about Jesus? 

— Do you love them enough to tell them the truth – because real love does not just rejoice in unrighteousness and call it love; real love rejoices with the truth.