(Testimony shared 10/27/24; the Sunday Cheryl & I first returned to church after her stroke)

August 31, 2024 is a day that Cheryl & I will never forget. It’s the day when after a week of Cheryl having unusual physical difficulties, going to the doctor, getting medication, watching things get progressively worse until she couldn’t stand or walk to the bathroom, that we finally went to the emergency room and discovered to our shock and dismay that she was in the process of an ongoing and devastating stroke. This totally upended our lives. Cheryl was left with what the hospital doctor called “severe damage,” unable to move anything on her left side, her arm or leg. We are here to tell you today, the last two months has been a dark, dark valley for us.

But we are also here to tell you that in the dark valleys — God is with us!
He HAS been with us. A couple of years ago I learned that in the exact middle of Psalm 23 — a significant place for the Hebrews — is the phrase “for You are with me.” God inspired David to put that phrase right in the middle of that great Psalm, to show us that THIS is what it’s all about; THIS is our hope; THIS is our comfort in “the valley of the shadow of death,” and “in the presence of our enemies” — what is it? “For YOU are with me.” That’s our hope, that’s our comfort — that God is with us. And we are here to tell you today that He IS. In the darkest valleys of your life — and we’ve been in a dark one — God is with us.

He’s been with us, and He’s been walking with us, doing His work in us, and He’s been teaching us. And so this first Sunday back with you, I felt led to just share with you a testimony of some of the things we’ve learned and experienced these past weeks. They’ve been costly lessons for us, but they’ve been good ones. I hope you can learn from some of them today:

I. Life Is Uncertain
James 4 says “You don’t know what your life will be like tomorrow” and we have seen like never before, how true that is! We didn’t get any advance warning about this. We didn’t get some feeling like “something was about to happen.” No, to be honest with you, we were looking forward to a restful Labor Day weekend. All of us had been through the direct hit of Hurricane Beryl in July, and like all of us Cheryl & I worked hard to clear our yard, and I helped Dolan and David and our youth a little bit with some of our members’ yards — and I was worn out. In fact I got sick the next week, and then Cheryl did too. We got well — and then got sick with something else the next week. And then the next week our family had a huge crisis: my mom’s husband, who’d been battling Multiple Myeloma (the same illness Donald Hintze, who preached here Sunday, has) finally passed away after 8 years of struggle. My mom was devastated, and we all went up there for a week to help her. So finally we were back home, and we were ready for some rest; Labor Day weekend was coming, football was starting, and we planned to have a nice restful weekend. Except we didn’t. Because from a human standpoint, life is uncertain. We don’t know what a day will bring. We had no idea what was waiting for us, just around the corner.

Cheryl’s stroke was a total surprise to us, a total shock. In fact she enjoys a little bit too much telling a couple of stories about when it first hit:
— It started that Monday when she had walked her usual three miles that morning with our neighbor Lea Ann. Afterwards Cheryl was following me through the house, filling me in on various stories from her walk, when she said, “I think you need to help me; I’m losing my balance.” But before I knew it, she had fallen to the ground. On my foot. I was trying to help her up, but I could not get my foot out! It was one of those “tragi-comic” moments — right out of a tv sit com. I just hollered: “Ow, my foot!” Cheryl started laughing, and she was able to roll herself off of my foot. 
Cheryl told this story to David Gregory, and he said: “911; what is your emergency?” “My wife is on my foot!”
— Cheryl recuperated quickly from that fall, and unfortunately she chalked it up to low blood sugar because she hadn’t eaten since lunch Sunday. But a couple of days later, after a doctor diagnosed her with high blood pressure and put her on medication, Cheryl again became weak and asked me to walk her to the bathroom. We were doing ok, until we got to the little toilet room just off of our master bath. At the last moment, she fell to the floor, and wedged herself between the toilet and the wall. It was a really difficult spot! Making it worse was that during the fall, Cheryl had dislodged the toilet seat. So first item of business was to fix the seat back on, so that hopefully we could get her up there. Problem was, I couldn’t fix it! I tried and tried, but “Mr. Handyman” just could not get those little tabs back on right! Cheryl said: “Hand it to me!,” and while she was still lodged beside the toilet, with one hand, she fixed the seat! Then somehow we got her up, and that day we ended up going to the ER.
But later in the hospital, Cheryl told this story to our sons. They said: “Don’t worry Mom, we’ll come down there. You won’t have to worry about Dad trying to fix anything!” David Gregory ended up putting grab bars up in our house before our kids came down, and we were very thankful for it!

But all this to say, this was a total shock to our family. As many of you know, I’ve had bad health for years, that’s why I sit to preach, but Cheryl has always been healthy. She walked three miles a day. She told the doctor that she was disappointed that her daily walking didn’t forestall the stroke. He said, “Your walking saved your life. Most people with this kind of stroke are either dead or in a coma.” That should be a good lesson for many of us! Several of our friends and family members are now walking daily, just one of many good things God’s brought out of Cheryl’s stroke.

But this totally came out of the blue for us. Before Cheryl’s stroke, we were studying through the Book of James together as a church; I was looking forward to sharing the last part of James 4:13-16: “Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, and spend a year there and engage in business and make a profit.” 14 Yet you do not know what your life will be like tomorrow. You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away. 15 Instead, you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we will live and also do this or that.” 16 But as it is, you boast in your arrogance; all such boasting is evil.”

We can make several applications from this:
— First and most importantly, you need to make absolutely certain about your salvation — NOW! Don’t say, “Well, someday I’ll give my life to the Lord. I’ll do it when we have kids; I’ll do it when the kids are grown; I’ll do it when I’ve sown my wild oats; I’ll do it when …” NO! Like James says, “You don’t know what your life will be like tomorrow.” In fact, you don’t even know if you HAVE tomorrow! If you haven’t done it already, you need to give your life to Jesus as your Lord & Savior TODAY!

— AND secondly, this is a needed reminder for many of us, not to take things for granted. Don’t take your health for granted. Don’t take your time with your family for granted. Don’t take your plans for tomorrow for granted. You really don’t know if you will have them. You may think you do, but you really don’t.

Like James commands us, always say, “If the Lord wills, we will LIVE and do this or that …”. Always remember that all your plans, all your days, are subject to the will of God. Live and appreciate each day God gives you.
Yes, God knows it all. But from a human standpoint, our lives are much less certain than we often think they are.

II. The Power of the Word of God
One of the most important ways God walks with us when tragedy strikes, is through His word. Cheryl & I both grew up in a strong youth group at the First Baptist Church of Harrah, Oklahoma, and we both learned the importance of spending time in God’s word every day. Psalm 119 says: “Your word is lamp to my feet, and a light to my path,” and we have both experienced the reality of that over these past days. With the crisis we were going through it’s been impossible to have a set aside time to read the Bible and pray every day — really for the first time for us in our lives. But we could still walk with God and let His word minister to us, through scriptures that we have memorized. I’d just finished memorizing Psalm 118 the week Cheryl had her stroke, so every day, whenever I woke up on the couch in that hospital room, I would quote Psalm 118, and every day, it would draw me close to Him, with its opening words: “Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; for His lovingkindness is everlasting.” His word drew me into His presence, and then I would then spend some time in prayer, both for our needs, and for others in our family and our church family who are undergoing similar trials.

God’s word also carried Cheryl through this time. Two verses ministered to her particularly:
— Isaiah 58:11 “And the Lord will continually guide you, and satisfy your desire in scorched places, and give strength to your bones; and you will be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water whose waters do not fail.”
That verse helped her to trust God’s leadership — and also encouraged her that He will give strength back to her bones as she recuperates!
— Joshua 1:9 “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Cheryl has leaned on this verse every day, in times like the first session at rehab, when the therapist told her to stand up and take a step — she had to face down a lot of fear that moment — but with God’s help she was indeed strong and courageous, and she took that first, brave, difficult step.

In different places in the Bible, God calls His word a “lamp,” a “light,” a “fire,” a “daily bread,” “milk,” “meat” — and more. We have found His word to be all of that for us in this time. But His word can only have the place in our lives that we give it. So I just want to challenge you today: when your tragedy strikes — and some day it will — how much of His word will you have hidden in your heart, ready to be used by His Spirit to minister to you in your time of need? Remember, you don’t know when that time is coming; you have to prepare for it NOW. Find key scriptures, and memorize them. Scripture memory is not just for little kids; this is grownup stuff; this is spiritual warfare. Be a grownup spiritually; and arm yourself now with God’s word for the battles that are coming in your life.

III. The Ministry of the people of God
Cheryl & I will both testify to how important the prayers and the ministry of the people of God have been to us in this time. We’ve had so many visits, calls, meals, snacks, financial gifts, acts of service like doing our laundry, mowing our lawn, shopping for us — just on and on. But most importantly, the prayers. Over and over we’ve felt the power of the prayers of God’s people.

When Cheryl had finished her week at the hospital, we were trying to get her into rehab, and there were so many complications with that, and I was just totally overwhelmed. But all of the sudden, it all fell into place, and we got her in. And it’s hard to describe it other than to say that I had a peace, and it all worked out — and I had strongest sense: this is the power fo the prayers of God’s people working. I just “felt” your prayers in a strong and unusual way. Some of you know that sensation; you’ve been through it. Never let the devil tell you that your prayers are not important. They are strong and powerful, and God uses the prayers of His people.

We saw it again the first morning in rehab, when Cheryl had had NOTHING on her left side, but that day we specifically asked for prayer, and she was able to take her first steps. We were both in tears, as God heard the prayers of His people. And we’ve seen it over and over: with the first movement of her left hand, and the first movement of her hamstring in the rehab here in Angleton.

I do an overview of the SBC Explore the Bible lesson for our Sunday School teachers each week on my blog and YouTube, and so I asked teachers across the country who watch it to please join us in prayer for Cheryl. One pastor’s wife/SS teacher whose husband had a stroke wrote: “Therapy is a great help, but nothing like the prayers of the body of Christ.” Cheryl & I love that statement – and we both know it’s true.

As I said, you all have ministered to us in so many ways. I taped all the cards Cheryl received at the rehab in Pearland on the cabinet in her room there — and every nurse that walked in said “WOW! You must really be loved!” And we have felt that over and over. When tragedy strikes, God’s people come through. This is a good lesson for us:

1. Make sure that you are an active part of a local church. Become a member; get involved. Make sure people know you and can minister to you when your time of need comes.
2. Make sure that you are part of a local church so that you can BE the minister to OTHER people in their time of need too! God wants to use you to help His people. Make sure you’re in position to be able to do that. You’ll be a great blessing to others if you will.

IV. The Picture of Christ’s Ministry
I wanted to share one specific incident, because I believe it illustrates in a powerful way what Jesus does for us. A couple of days after we’d been at the rehab center, our daughter Libby sent us a vase of flowers. I was trying to hook up our ROKU up to the tv in the room so Cheryl could watch the OU game, and as I was pulling a cord, it hit the vase and knocked it over, and water went everywhere. There were papers and clothes and all kinds of things round, and it was just a big mess. I was so disgusted and frustrated.

But it just so happened that a cleaning lady was right there at the door, taking out our trash, and with a sweet foreign accent she said, “No worry mister! No worry mister!” She jumped right in and cleaned it all up in a flash, with the best attitude, and when she’d finished cleaning it all up, I told her how appreciative I was, but she said: “Nothing happen here Mister. Now look like nothing happen here.” I said, I like that expression, “Nothing happened here.” She told me that her father used to use that expression when she was growing up; he said if you clean a mess up good enough, it will look like “nothing happened here” — and that became one of their “family sayings” that they used all the time growing up: “Nothing happened here.”

Later I thought about that: This is what the Lord does for us: we’ve all sinned; we’ve all made a huge mess out of our lives, and our hearts are all stained with sin. And on our own, we have no way to clean it all up. But when we put our faith in Jesus’ death on the cross, the Bible says He “cleanses our hearts by faith” — so that now, from God’s perspective, it looks like “nothing happened here!” As the old expression goes, it’s “just as if I’d never sinned,” because Jesus has cleansed our hearts. That’s the beauty of the gospel. And that truth is all through scripture:
— Psalm 51:7 “Purify me with hyssop and I shall be clean; wash me and I shall be whiter than snow”
— Psalm 103:12 “as far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us.”
— Isaiah 1:18 “Come now, and let us reason together,” says the Lord, “Though your sins are as scarlet,They will be as white as snow; Though they are red like crimson, They will be like wool.”
— In Acts 15:9 Peter said God makes no distinction between Jews & Gentiles, that for anyone He is “cleansing their hearts by faith.”
— I John 1:9 “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins, and cleanse us from all unrighteousness”

One of the greatest blessings of the good news of Jesus is that He cleans up the mess we’ve made in our lives; He cleans our hearts when we put our faith in Him, so that now we are “as white as snow,” as Isaiah 1 says. Just like that woman’s father gave her the expression, “Nothing happened here,” so OUR Heavenly Father has given this to us as His children: because of what Jesus did on the cross, He can look at our lives that were stained with sin and say: “Nothing happened here!” “He made Him who knew no sin, to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.” Through Jesus, all of us can say: “Nothing happen here Mister!” If that’s never happened for you, make sure you trust Jesus as your Lord & Savior today!

V. “Servant of God”?
There’s so many lessons we can learn through times like this, so many ways in which we’re refined, and purified, and can grow, because we went through all of this. One of the great truths we learn from trials is that God does use everything we go through, to advance His purposes in our lives. Romans 8:28 says “And we KNOW that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” Even the worst things we go through, God has a purpose for, and He uses them for our good, and for His glory. Even the worst things we face, are in effect “servants of God” which ultimately bring about good things in our lives.

If you followed us on Facebook while we were at rehab, you probably heard something about Servando Gonzales, an occupational therapist who works at Encompass Pearland, and with whom I said Cheryl had a love/hate relationship. He worked her hard every day, and if you can imagine it, Cheryl gave him a hard time back, and acted like she was being tortured by him. But it was all in good fun, and she knew he was doing her a lot of good. But they went back & forth with good-natured jibes. (She has a very similar relationship with Melissa Garcia here at UTMBA too! We’re very grateful for how God is using them.)

One afternoon after one of those hard therapy sessions, Servando stuck his head in our room, and like everyone who came in, he noticed all the get-well cards on the doors of Cheryl’s cabinet and said: “Look at all those cards!” Cheryl said, “People like me!” Servando shot back: “They must not know you like I do!” That’s the kind of back & forth they had.

And he worked her hard in the rehab. Some of you saw the video, when after a couple of weeks of rehab, Cheryl was just laboring with the rolling walker — this was after a long hard session already, and Servando didn’t tell her he was going to try to have her walk all the way back to her room. It was about 250 feet to her room, and she hadn’t walked more than 75 feet at a time. He just drove her on, saying “Up … up … up, go … go … go …” while she pushed that walker. It was hard, but it was good. The Lord was using him to help make Cheryl better.

Servando used this to his advantage in one session when he had Cheryl lay on her side on a mat in the gym, and he sat in a chair in front of him, and he had her kick her affected leg out until hit him. He laughed, and she kicked even stronger once she realized she could kick him; I laughed, and caught it on video. After all Servando had put her through, it was a great motivation for her to kick him, again and again and again!

During one session Cheryl asked Servando: “What does your name mean, do you know?” He said “I think it means something like ‘servant of God.” Cheryl, who felt like she was suffering so much under his service, responded: “Are you sure it’s servant of GOD?!”

But it’s like that with most of the difficult events that come into our lives. Romans 8 says God uses everything that happens in our life — even very hard, difficult things — to further His purpose in us: which Romans 8:29 says is to conform us to the image of Christ.

But we might look at some very difficult trial or event in our life and say “Are you sure that God can use THIS?” Like Cheryl asked Servando, “Are you sure it’s a servant of GOD?!” But with everything that happens to us, we know it is. God uses even the most difficult things we experience as His servants to advance His purposes in our lives. He uses them to test us, to purify us, to refine us, and to make us more like Christ.

This whole experience has been that for Cheryl & me. Listen, we laugh a lot; we’ve made made a lot of jokes about things — but that’s because we’ve got to laugh at things sometime just to keep our sanity — and there have been some funny things to laugh about. But don’t mistake it: this has been the most difficult, most devastating experience either of us has ever faced, and we’ve had some difficult times. After the first week at the hospital in Galveston, we both agreed this had been the worst week of our lives. To have your wife, to whom you’ve been married for 42 years, healthy and active and walking 3 miles a day; who is ministering to YOU because you have been sick, suddenly struck down so that she can’t use her left side, can’t sit up, can’t walk, can’t feed herself or do anything for herself, is devastating. To feel helpless and be unable to serve the church body you’ve been trying to build up and shepherd for the past 6 six years. To see my sister lose her husband, our kids and grandkids favorite “Uncle Don,” and I can’t even go see her; for my mom to have a critical surgery, and now losing the will to live, and I can’t be with her; for all our plans, our finances, our health — everything to be suddenly all upended and thrown into chaos. Don’t let the little lights of humor we’ve shared obscure how dark this situation has been for us. It’s been horrible. It’s been the darkest valley of our lives. I’m not minimizing that.

— But at the same time, understand that God has used the darkness of this valley AS HIS SERVANT to accomplish His purposes in our lives. For Cheryl this stroke has cast her upon God and His word like never before: she’s said, “I LOVE God’s word; it has brought me through.” His word has come alive to her like never before.

— For me this valley has tested the wedding vows we made 42 years ago: “for better/for worse; for richer/for poorer; in sickness and in health”! Will I willing to set aside everything else if need be, and totally devote myself to care for my wife? And will I too depend on God in this time, spiritually, emotionally, financially, and even physically? If you remember, before all this happened, I had been the sick one; I was the weak and shaky one! Cheryl was helping me all the time; there were times when she’d mow the lawn for me, and take care of me. And now in an instant I am the more “healthy” one of the two! So many of y’all have said you were praying for God to uphold me, and I can say, He has! I can hardly believe that with all the multiplied stress of the past two months, I have not experienced a relapse of my dysautonomia. I can’t believe I’ve been able to hold up physically; I’ve been able to help Cheryl stand, and get out of a chair or wheelchair — when for the past couple of years I have been barely able to stand myself! Where did that strength come from? Well, we know where that has come from; Paul wrote in II Corinthians 12 that God told him, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is perfected in your weakness.” In my weakness, God has given me all the strength I need. And your prayers have been a part of that!

So God has been working in powerful ways these last weeks. Even this tragedy has been His servant. We might be tempted to look at this experience and say, “Are you sure this event is a servant of God?” It’s so hard! And yet according to scripture, the answer is “YES; it is!” God causes all things to work together for good to those who love Him; who are called according to His purpose.”

I hope that you will look at the difficulties in your life the same way today.
As hard as what you are going through may be, God will use this to purify you from sin, to change your attitudes, to build your patience and perseverance, to cast you on God and His word and prayer like never before — and in all of it, to make you more like Jesus. Believe this, and determine to purposefully work together with God, for all He wants to achieve in your life in this time.

CONCLUSION
God never promised us that tragedy would never strike us here on earth. Jesus said in this world, you will have tribulations. Many of us act like we never will — but for all of us, some time or another, those times come.
— The question is, who and what will help you through your time? Do you know that God is walking with you, because you’ve trusted Jesus as your Savior? If not, that’s the first thing you need to do right now.
— Then learn to walk with Him every day in His word and prayer. Memorize Psalms and other key scriptures so that His Spirit will be able to minister to you through His word in every situation.
— And make sure you are active in a local church family that will be there for you — and make sure that you are there for them too!
— Never stop praying, for yourself and for others. God uses the prayers of His people in a powerful way.
— And in every situation in your life, even the most painful, believe that God is working. And let Him do all that He’s trying to do in your life.
Cheryl & I will testify that all of these things really do make a difference when tragedy strikes, if you know that God is with you!